Pride

I don't often brag about anything I've done. More often I'll be the one pointing out my faults, but last night and this morning I did things I am REALLY proud of, so forgive me while I gush a little.

1. Rope Climbs
I am working hard on rope climbs. I should have known something was up when Tyler asked me how I felt about heights about 10 minutes into personal training. Other than one weird moment during OCR class at the Lyndon Town School playground when I got to the top of the child sized climbing wall and couldn't get myself to go over and come down I've never had a problem with heights. Heights with muddy water pits at the bottom are another story and I'm not going there. One fear at a time...

Excuse the tangent, I'm back now. I finished some lat pull downs with the functional trainer and noticed Tyler had the ladder out and it was set up near the climbing rope. Oh, so that's what he meant about heights. I was the only one there...no way was I going to be able sneak out unnoticed. So I pulled up my big girl pants and discovered I'd be working on my rappelling (Yippee??). Tyler demonstrated and then it was my turn. The first time I climbed 3 rungs, grabbed the rope, stepped off the ladder and did a rope hang for a few seconds before I rappelled down. Then he let me play with the prowler and I was hooked. Give me a circuit involving heavy pushing, pulling or lifting and you've guaranteed I'll do whatever else you ask me without complaint.

My next rotation at the rope I climbed to the 4th rung and did a rope hang for about 10 seconds before rappelling down. Third round was a 15 second rope hang from the fifth rung and down I went. Next I went up 6 rungs and I was higher up than I had ever been. Tyler told me to open my eyes, look around and get used to the view from up there. I hung there swinging around with my eyes closed for a few seconds before I followed directions and looked around. The last round was from the 6th rung again and Tyler wanted me to try to go up the rope after I'd been hanging for about 15 seconds. The will was there, but my mind refused. That's okay: I know I will do, I know I can do it.

2. Box Jumps
In August I wrote a post about facing my fear of box jumps. This morning, during the Survivor Series workout I had the opportunity to prove to myself that I've conquered that fear. I completed 50 box jumps. Yes, it was the tiny box, but I did 50 after completing 50 burpees, 50 goblet squats, 50 TRX rows, 50 push ups, 50 kettle bell swings and 50 banded reverse lunges. Then I tackled my box jumps. My form was good and my landings were pretty soft. I considered trying the next box up, but decided it was more important to me to do 50 good jumps than to push how high I was jumping, I got my 50 box jumps in and I was thrilled. No fear  or doubt, just determination and the knowledge I could do it.

So there you have it...I gushed about my accomplishments. I am often proud of myself, but I prefer to keep that to myself. I don't feel the need to draw attention to myself very often. I do what I do, I don't see it as exceptional or all that amazing. I don't want or need to make everything all about me.

To be honest, I can't imagine anything in life more boring than me talking about me. Yes, I do keep this blog, I do write about me, but in my life and my interactions with people I prefer to be the listener: I want people to feel comfortable talking to me. I don't need to hear my own voice, I know what it sounds like and for many hours of the day Monday through Friday I hear it. If I have something to say I'll make sure I say it, but by and large I prefer to let others do the talking. I'll do the listening.

Maybe I don't feel the need to talk because I believe strongly that actions speak louder than words. I could talk about making a difference or I could put my head down, focus and actually make a difference. I'm trying to do that now. I'm not wasting one second of the rest of my life buying stuff in an attempt to feel better. I'd rather put that money to better use. That's the path I've chosen on my journey, I'm not saying everyone has to do it. I'm not looking for pats on the back or anything. I am doing what feels right for me.

Thanks for reading...