Competition

I didn't think I was that competitive, I was fooling myself. I may well be flexible, giving and caring, but give me the proper circumstances and my competitive side rises. I don't think there's anything wrong with being competitive, it's not like I start trash talking people or being a nasty jerk.

So what brought out my competitive side this week? Muscle Hour at Pride Fitness Performance in part. I LOVE that class. I want to learn more about Olympic lifts and I want to work on my form. Let's face it: if it is heavy I must lift it or flip it. Tell me we're going to work on deadlifts and you have my attention and eager participation. That happened Wednesday evening. We worked on dumbbell snatches and the board also said deadlifts. Deadlifts? If I were my dog Abbey my ears would have stood at attention and I probably would have been doing her whole body wiggle. Thankfully for the rest of the class and the instructor I am not able to behave like an over-excited Boxer. If I have given you any mental images you could have lived without I am deeply sorry.

We practiced our snatches first. The snatch part I'm not so bad at, the squat part...UGH! Overhead squats are such a weakness, but this post isn't about that. I could write a million entries on my weaknesses. Today it's competition. So back on track...

While we were still working on snatches Tyler had us come into the Weight Cave to try our deadlifts. Yes, I almost skipped in when it was my turn. My first lift was 225 pounds for 5 reps. I'll be honest, that felt heavy and I considered calling it right there and just going back to the snatches and working on my overhead squat. I decided against it, because really 225 wasn't that heavy and I wanted to see if I could lift 315 pounds again. That was my personal record (PR) for a deadlift until Wednesday evening.

My next set of deadlifts was 275 I think, then 295. Then my PR came up 315 pounds. I noticed Tyler stuck around for that set of deadlifts, For the others he was watching me, but also coaching others in the class. I lifted 315 pounds and it didn't feel any heavier than the 225 had, I really need to ponder that more. That made me feel GREAT. I remember the first time I ever deadlifted 315 pounds with Ben, it was the heaviest thing I could ever imagine lifting and it was HARD. Super hard, my bladder might have let go a little in fact. Yes, yes, that was TMI, but it was honest.

I figured we would be done after that round of lifting, but Tyler said we would do one more round and he added 30 pounds to the bar. Yep, I was going to see if I could deadlift 345 pounds, I did do the math in my head a few times while I waited for my turn and tried to talk the little voice in my head into shutting up and not showing gruesome images of me ripping my arms out of their sockets when I tried to lift the bar. I was pretty sure nothing that dramatic would happen, but not positive.

Then it was my turn. It was about then that I finally noticed what Tyler had been doing in the Weight Cave with the marker. The deadlift board moved in there and had been empty up until that night. Now there were initials and numbers up there. Many under the "200 Club" heading and three under the "300 Club" heading. My initials and two other men with 315 pounds.

Hmmm...so much for not being competitive because there was no way in hell I was not going to lift that 345 pounds. Not that I need to be the best, not that I have anything against men, but I had to do it.

To shorten this up so you can get back to your day: I was able to successfully lift 345 pounds. So were the two other men. I was proud of my accomplishment for sure, and I was proud of everyone else. I remember the first time I got to deadlift and how empowering it was to lift more than I thought I could.

I rediscovered my competitive side on Wednesday, but I also discovered I don't need to be the center or the "best". I need to do the best I can do and not being as good as the person next to me or across the room from me is not losing. My biggest competition has always and will always live inside me, right between my ears as a matter of fact.

My competition likes to tell me I'm not good enough, or smart enough and is happy to point out that everyone else can do things I can't. I have figured her out though, when I point out what I CAN do and DO do well there is silence.

I've said it before: I may never be the best or the fastest, I may not be the teacher's pet or the instructor's favorite. I will be consistent, I will give my best effort and I will offer my support and encouragement whenever I can. Life is too short to need to be better than everyone else. I want to be a strong support, not a shining star. That's my path and I accept it.

Thanks for reading! The next time I'm at my happy place (in less than 12 hours), I will take a picture of the deadlift board and post it.

So I need to learn how to center things before I take a picture, but you get the idea.